We just hired a new girl. She's 23 and this is her first job. We put her on the computer for the first couple of days for orientation and training. But ever since we put her in the front she has been asking me and the manager if we are going to fire her or if she is in trouble. At first we smiled and told her not to worry because she was doing fine. We understand first jobs can be a little intimidating and she is nervous.

Now she has been with us for two weeks. She asks me every hour if we are going to fire her. I am not exaggerating. Dead serious. Anytime I look in her direction she asks if she is in trouble. I am generally very patient about a lot of things, but I am just so close to sending her home the next time she asks me. We have spoken to her about this and flat out told her it is starting to get annoying. Last night she crossed the line when she called me at home to ask if the manager was going to fire her.

She obviously has no confidence in herself and has very low self-esteem. But now I'm wondering if she may have some underlying mental problems. She called the store 6 times within five hours this morning to see if the checks were in. I told her our store generally doesn't get the checks until 12pm because our boss has to drive to six stores with checks and we are usually the last one. She was so scared to talk to me or the manager that everytime she called, she asked for a different employee. We have never yelled at her. We have never been mean to her. The worst thing we have said to this girl was that her asking if she is going to be fired is getting annoying and then asked her to stop it.

I don't work with her again until Monday. But I know the first thing she will ask me is if she's going to be fired. The manager told me to just send her home if she does this.

dude. that's totally annoying and getting obnoxious.

seriously, if she's going to bring herself down like this after you guys specifically told her not to, then she's foretelling her own end with your store.

It sounds like she may have a serious anxiety disorder.  I just went through a similar situation…I basically had a nervous breakdown because of it.  I almost took my own life and ended up taking a month of medical leave from work.  I'm fine now that I have the right anti-depressants and anxiety medication, but for a couple weeks I felt like I was living through hell.  I lost all ability to concentrate and had seriously thought I lost my ability to perform as an engineer.  I can't say for certain that's similar to what this girl is going through, but it does sound very manic and in need of some chemical help.

I would recommend she go see a doctor or just fire her a laugh at her tears.

I agree that it sounds like an underlying anxiety disorder… she is fixating, which is a classic symptom. 

She called me three times over the weekend on my days off. The first time, I very nicely asked her not to call my phone again unless there was a problem in the store or emergency. The second time she called I was a little meaner to her. I did not answer on the third call. She left a message. "Hi I'm really sorry that I've been calling you on your days off. I just hope you're not going to fire me over this." I'm starting to think this girl really does want to be fired.

The manager is now on vacation so now whatever happens with this girl is up to me. Before he left he told me to watch her because she's been calling the store and asking some of the employees to lend her money. I also suspect that she went through my phone last week when she was supposed to be watching her training videos. I leave my phone in the office on the desk when I am working. During the time she was in the office I received 2 text messages that I did not know about until over the weekend. The only way to clear the message alert on my phone is to open it and read each received message. She was asking me about my phone and service, but I figured it was just because she saw the phone on the desk. Just making conversation. Unfortunately I do not have a camera in the office. But she doesn't know that. So this Thursday I have to sit down and have a little talk with her.

ugh.

good luck..

Maybe she want's to get fired so she can get unemployment or something???

Good Luck!

I don't think she's smart enough to purposely get fired to collect unemployment. I don't think she makes enough money or hours to qualify either. Tomorrow's going to be fun!

I'm following this like a cheap soap opera.

You and me both Jen!

sounds like she has a serious problem…

good luck…

I don't believe it. We went a full day without asking if she was in trouble or going to be fired. The only thing she said was "I'm not going to ask you that thing today because of what you said." I told her the next time she asked me she was going to be sent home for the day. Hopefully the problem is solved.

Well that isn't nearly as dramatic as I was hoping for! Glad it's hopefully sorted though.

Well…your problem is solved.  I'm worried about how restraining her anxiety could affect her.  Watch out, she could be prone for a meltdown.

She actually seems to be doing better. Not just about restraining herself, but I think she's starting to feel more comfortable. I told her that the first couple weeks are difficult. There is just so much to learn. But I've been working one on one with her and training her a little at a time.

Richard, I just want you to know, I am not a mean person. I know what it's like to go through depression and anxiety. I went through that and it still comes and goes sometimes. I am careful of what I say to people and how I say it. But it is just unacceptable to be calling us after our work hours or on our days off to ask if we are going to fire her.

IOM - I wasn't implying that you're a mean person.  I mean, just judging from your posts here, you're very sweet and caring.  The intention of my posts was just to make sure you keep an extra eye on her.  She might seem better now, but there's no telling what could set her off.  I could be totally wrong, but judging from your account, it seems like she has a systemic problem and not just new job jitters.  You're absolutely right, her behavior was unacceptable and it seems like you handled it very professionally and humane.  Just try to remember that it could be a case of chemistry over attitude on her part.

For those of you hoping for a conclusion filled with drama, here it is.

She started calling me again. It got to the point that I stopped answering her calls. And if I didn't answer her calls she would call me about 5 more times before she left a message. She called me on my days off (she knows they are my days off, too) to let me know she was running late or that she couldn't work. I have told her a number of times to call the store and talk to the manager on duty because on my days off I have nothing to do with the store unless there is an emergency.

This past Saturday she called my phone to tell me she could not make it in because she had gone out the night before and was stuck in another town with no ride and no money for a taxi. She left this message 15 minutes before she was supposed to work. I called her back and left a message on her phone. I told her (again) that it is her responsibility to call the store and speak to the manager on duty. So I waited 30 minutes and then called the store just so they knew they would be short a person for the day. And also so that if she did not call she couldn't turn around and say that she had left me a message and I had already known about it. When I called, the manager there told me she had already called and she gave the girl a choice, if she didn't go in that day, she didn't have to come back to work again. The girl was hired to work on weekends. She had already called out on 2 Saturdays, left early after working for 2 hours and was trying to get out of working for next Saturday.

So, she didn't go to work on Saturday which means she is no longer with us. I was at a party on Sunday. When I checked my phone I saw that she had called me 6 times before finally leaving a message. I called her back. She starts yelling at me for firing her. After she finally stops I get my chance to speak. I told her I did not fire her. It was a decision of the manager and she had spoken to our boss first. I explained to her why the manager let her go and that she was told before that she had to stop calling out on Saturdays. She was hired on the condition that she could do both Saturdays and Sundays before she had filled out the paperwork.

I feel bad for her, but she did bring this on herself.

Don't feel bad for her…she had been given plenty of opportunities and knew, both before hand and once she was hired, what was expected of her.

I would suggest keeping an eye out though.  She sounds rather unbalanced and you simply never know what someone like that will do.  Not saying to make you paranoid, but…

yeah, I'm with Taz on this one - especially calling that many times after she was fired.  If she calls you again, even one more time I would get an anti-harassment order against her.  Have you been documenting dates and times that she has called? Hopefully she has given up her manic crusade, but if she decides to call again, think about getting an order.